Let’s Begin Again

Relying on an entity outside of me to do the work for me was my MO, or, habit, if you will.What did I know?I literally had no indication or evidence that I should or could trust myself to be consistent or successful at AN-EE-THING.So, of course, I was seeking a healer, a helper, a savior.Someone I could surrender it all to.Someone who I could trust to take care of it.A reason.But, what it was actually, I later learned, was a reason–or an excuse, rather–to remain complacent and “give up”.Ironically, though, at the same time, I was also seeking a reason to not give up, to keep going, if that makes any sense whatsoever. And I was really conscientious about who or what my reason to keep going should or would be.Thankfully, I had enough insight–based on past experiences–to know I did not want it to be any of these:~ a love interest, object of my desire, and/or lust
~ self-righteous pride
~ false hopesI did not want any of these to be the fuel for my fire, my source of inspiration, nor the reason I got out of bed in the morning.It had to be pure.It had to be real.And, on my journey, I came to discover, it had to be the Holy Spirit.And a conviction to surrender and hold myself accountable for habits and behaviors that kept me facing the same disappointing outcomes over and over, so I could live a healed life of peace and of meaning and of sanctity.Some relate this conviction to Jesus’ call to repentance, which is truly a blessing, a reason, that can feel like a curse (although, lemme tell ya, walking through the valley of the shadow of death is scary at first and can kinda feel like a punishment!).Through the process of repentance, to which our love for God calls us, God humbles, yet empowers and frees us. And, it is my belief persevering on this journey is what leads to ultimate peace.But, if our ego is too big to handle or accept that, we’re going to continue down the path of destruction and experience more and more heartache.Just as I have (and sometimes still do! I mean, let’s be real!).A wise professor once reminded me, “Life is not for the faint of heart!”THANKS BE TO GOD, He forgives, teaches, and gives the opportunity to BEGIN AGAIN.To all of us. And, friends, lemme tell ya (again 🙂 ), it is glorious.He doesn’t do the work for us, however, which I learned the hard way. But He does bless us with the grace and the strength.With humility and power,MicheleWrite to me!Tell me about an area of your life you are ready to surrender and change by replying to this email.Next week: “Stop looking over your shoulder, you’re gonna hurt your neck!”